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Truly a Gift of Intimate Love... Wrapped in Griefs Radiant Heart!

It was five years ago today...

I remember it as though it was yesterday.

It was cold out and a fresh cover of snow had fallen the night before.

I was on "annie the pet nannie" duty at the time, and the owners were coming home later that day.

So, I was cleaning, picking up and making sure their home was in tip top shape.

I was feeling a bit sad and lonely... as it was Valentine's Day, and my life was void of a lover. Cupids' arrow had no heart to pierce.

Then, all of a sudden, out of the quiet morning hours came the shrill sound of a cop car siren! It raced up the street, and stopped at the neighbors next door.

I flew to the back bedroom that faced their direction... My heart was racing wildly as I peered out the window!

And there, lying on the sidewalk was a man... A woman stood beside him… his snow shovel stuck in the bank!

I felt seized up in a moment of horror... and then a force beyond me, led me out the front door running up the sidewalk behind the police officer, to where they both were.

I took her in my arms, in a strong embrace, as she wept over him.

I grounded deeply to anchor myself in, and called upon the unseen assistance I knew was present.

I remember an instant when I felt like I was holding my mother, and looking at my father.

How this scene could be playing out for any of us.

The ambulance came a few minutes later... the First Responders secured him and rushed him off to the Emergency Room. His animating force, felt to me, as though it had already taken flight.

She and I went back into her home.

They had been together 50 years she told me, and he had heart issues in the past.

She asked if I would go to the hospital with her, and I said yes, of course I would.

We sat together in the ER waiting room, arm in arm braced in anticipation.

And then the doctor emerged...

I could tell by the look on his face, what news he had to break.

It was Valentine’s Day...

And the Love of her Life had gone away.

Those moments in time seemed to stand still...

As disbelief and grief seeped through her every pore.

I took her back home...

We stood together in the kitchen, as she called her out of town children.

"Dad is gone she said".

As the phone bellowed with cries on the other end.

I spent the remainder of the day with her...

As dinner time approached, some of her friends started to file in.

Exhausted and feeling my service was complete, I headed to the door to gather my gear.

She followed me…

Ready to leave, I turned to her...

Our eyes met deeply in solidarity.

There was nothing more to say...

But what was felt, was an Intimate Love of Grand Proportion!

Witnessing Life's Precious Moment of Unification with its Source.

My Heart was filled to Overflowing. And I knew hers was too, for my Presence in Being with her through it all.

This afternoon I walked over to her house for the first time since that day.

She opened the door... and with a Big Smile gracing her Vibrant Face, she said …

"I was just talking about you, and here you are!"

She invited me in for tea... and we chatted for a while. She too felt like it was just yesterday.

We hugged once again... In the embrace of Eternal Union.

And as I walked home, I thought - Wow... what a crazy, wild, mysterious life this is!

And just when you think love is nowhere to be found...

All you have to do is STOP. And Be Willing to Face Death! And you will find Extraordinary Love!

I bow to my willingness to Show Up to Life... In All its Glory!

Annii

February 14, 2012 at 9:18pm cst

As I approached the oncoming curve of the Big Sur Cliffs… a large crowd of people and cars huddled in a small “viewing turn out” caught my attention. The energy was captivating and intense. I thought “what’s going on?” I too pulled my VW Bus into a free space near the rear, close to the road and got out. In just a few steps towards the front, I could see them! The Reason for the Gathering! The Great Masters had come to deliver a message!

I was frozen in my step. And my actual breath seized in a gasp of Acclamation… of Grandeur… of Acknowledgement! Their Energetic Presence was Shattering in its Capacity! I literally felt Suspended in Time… Their Resonant Field of Love pouring out was Extraordinary!

These Dark Winged Giants stood like Trogon Warriors upon the jagged rock wall that served as another protector. One stood closest to the parking area, the other back away.

I was in such a State of Awe… at how Big they were… at how Calm they seemed… and how Close they Allowed Us to be!

There were so many cameras clicking and flashing to capture the Moment in the Presence of these Great Stars!

Suddenly, after taking a few quick photos of my own, I began to feel irritated. Wishing the crowd would back off… and just Stop the flurry… and Listen to the Teacher!

Instantly, I got a “direct hit”… it was from the Mighty Being in Front…

She felt my internal angst… and had heard my earlier question… “what message do you have for us?”

She started… “it is OK – we are not bothered by the goings on… We are happy for the interested group in attendance! Everyone will Receive what they have come for!”

A few more minutes passed… the kind that give meaning to the words “eternal”… “timeless”... I could see by her body language the lesson was coming to a close, as she positioned herself for the Grand Finale!

And in One Piercing Look Back at the Crowd, she Proclaimed…

“Are You Willing to Stand in Your Greatness?

Your Own Truth?

Your Own Strength and Power?

And Fly Free?!”

“This is Who You Are!

This is What We have come to Show You!

That You are Free.

And Beyond Your Imagination!”

And in That Moment… She turned… and took One Small but Powerful Leap off that Sheer Cliff Edge! And let Herself fall into the Mighty Expanse below her!

And then Out Came those Massive Wings…

And with Grace and Tenacity, She Soared Free into the Silence!

Her Partner followed with the Same Majestic Expression!

As a Collective, We Stood Stunned!

Speechless... In Our Sovereignty.

Humbled, by the Mystery of Life.

And the Grand and Simple Truth... that Pervades All!

Annii

Written as a contribution to the “With Gangaji” community forum ; the story of my experience with the Big Sur Condors – August 16, 2014 1:03pm cst.

I was driving home earlier today, traveling on a secondary four lane highway… when I spot this small black animal sitting on the paved shoulder, really close to the road! And as I drive by, I see it’s a tiny puppy dog! Like… full grown and very small!

I thought… there is No Way I can leave that puppy dog sitting there! So… in Rapid Speed, I find the nearest turn around to head back towards the dog!

I am scanning the highway ahead as cars, trucks, and semi’s whiz by!

I’m like… holy man, am I going to have to drive in, and through and across this grassy, muddy ditch to get back to the puppy in time?!

Thankfully, there came a turn around, just as I was going to “go for” the most direct path on my rescue mission! I was most certainly in pursuit with an “eagle eye focus”!

My heart was just racing! And surely, my “travel guides” were intervening somehow!

I reach the dog still sitting in the exact same place it had been the whole entire time! Stopping quickly and parking on the shoulder a bit on the lane… hoping the traffic would stay in the outside lane!

I reach the little doggie and she immediately comes towards me waging her tail, and then lays down on her back wanting her tummy rubbed! 😊 The whole thing was so crazy!

I grab her collar tightly and scoop her up in my arms, and get back into my somewhat rusty pickup truck “Silver” 😊 (I always tell Silver to… “let’er buck” when we need to Get Somewhere!!)

There was a dirt driveway just ahead, and I figured that was where she came from! I get off the highway and head towards an off grid looking shanty (affectionately stated)!

A handful of small blonde haired shirtless brothers were playing outside, along chickens and roosters half their size!

The dad is off in the distance holding the youngest. He immediately comes over to my lowered window, as I ask “is this your dog?” as the children gather round. “Yes, it is… and I love that dog!” The man had a really gentle spirit and energy about him.

I explained I had found their dog, sitting near the busy highway on my way home… as I pass her through the window, and immediately start sobbing in relief! Oh God… 😊 The kids were absolutely silent as they listened and looked on… The mother was gone taking classes at a local community college, and the dad was holding down the homestead! He had his hands full when the dog somehow got off her leash!

I asked if I could hold the dog another time before I leave… as he passes her back through the window. What a sweet, sweet soul she was! Such a little lover… She thanked me profusely!!!

I handed her back through the window one more time! And as I started to back away the dad says… “we might breed her someday if you want one”… I smiled, 😊 still attempting to compose myself… and waved goodbye as I continued down the driveway! I am sure I will stop another time to see how my new friends are doing!

What a day to Remember! Exhausted and Happy!

Annii

August 31, 2020

The BWCAW Travel Guide

Trip Record Travel Log Personal Journal

A tree is hanging over the water in front of some rocks.

A table of contents for the book wilderness travel.

A picture of the sun setting over a lake.

Under the Covers...

A page of an article about the ancient wisdom of the earth.

A page of the text with several words and phrases.

A page of instructions for people to use their own animal.

A sheet of paper with names and places for people to sign.

A form that is written in english and has instructions.

A form that has been written to fill out.

A page of questions to be answered in the form of an exercise.

A poem about the sea and its inhabitants.

A page of an article with the title and some words.

The Schoolhouse experiment...

The New Earth Embodied...

A chalkboard with many different colored writing on it.

TSe

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